In our society, being tough is often seen as a virtue. Many of us are taught from a young age what being tough looks like. We are taught to bottle up our pain, practice mind over matter, and avoid a display of fear or weakness - be strong.

However, true strength isn't about putting up walls or hiding your emotions. It's not about pretending that everything is okay when it's not. In fact, being truly tough means being vulnerable.

Vulnerability is the key to being tough. It takes courage to open up and show your true self to the world. It takes strength to admit that you're struggling and ask for help when you need it.

When we try to be tough in the traditional sense, we often end up bottling up our emotions, which can lead to depression, anger, anxiety, and other mental health issues. Personally, I covered up my true feelings with anger and allowed it to take control of my life. When I started to realize how anger was affecting my physical body, it was a massive wake-up call for me.

So, how can we forget everything we know about being tough and start embracing vulnerability? Here are a few tips:

1.      Practice self-compassion. Strength comes from within, and it stems from self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would a friend who is going through a tough time. A great place to start is by becoming aware of how you talk to yourself. Do you constantly put yourself down or verbally beat yourself up? Becoming aware of it is half the battle.

2.      Build a support network. Surround yourself with people who love and accept you for who you are. Don't be afraid to lean on them when you need help. On the contrary, if you surround yourself with people who constantly have their guard up, people who are judgmental or unsupportive, you may find yourself feeling even more alone and isolated during difficult times. It's important to choose your circle wisely and seek out relationships that nourish and uplift you. When you surround yourself with people who support and accept you, you are more likely to feel safe and empowered to share your experiences and ask for help when you need it.

3.      Embrace your emotions. Allow yourself to feel all the feelings, especially the uncomfortable ones. Don't judge yourself for having emotions – they're a natural part of the human experience, and we all have them. When we don’t acknowledge our true feelings, we become disconnected from ourselves and others, losing sight of what's really important. By allowing ourselves to feel and express our true emotions, even the uncomfortable ones, we develop a greater understanding of ourselves and others. This self-awareness allows us to set healthy boundaries, communicate effectively, and build stronger, more authentic relationships.

4.      Practice mindfulness. Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings without judging or blaming yourself or others. This can help you bring clarity to the situation and better understand yourself and your emotions. When we deny or ignore our true feelings, we risk becoming disconnected from ourselves and others. We may hide behind a façade, pretending to be okay when we're not, or unintentionally push away those who genuinely care about us. True connections and authentic relationships thrive on honesty and vulnerability. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and express our true feelings, we invite others to do the same, fostering deeper connections and understanding.

5.      Be brave. Take risks and try new things, even if they scare you. This can help you build resilience and develop a stronger sense of self. By stretching ourselves in this way, we become more comfortable with vulnerability. By trying new things, especially when it’s scary, we learn to embrace vulnerability and develop a stronger sense of self. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, we demonstrate a willingness to engage in genuine connections with others and to take emotional risks. It is through vulnerability that we can truly express ourselves, share our hopes and fears, and form deep connections with others.

In Conclusion

Forget everything you know about being tough. Being vulnerable and open is the true key to strength. Embrace your emotions, build a support network, and practice self-compassion to become the strongest version of yourself.

Thank you for reading this blog post! If you enjoyed the content and want to learn more about the topics discussed, I highly recommend checking out my book, REFLECT: A Perspective on Understanding Your Reality and Becoming Unstuck. In it, I dive deeper into the strategies and insights shared in this post, offering even more valuable information and practical advice. Click here to order your copy of REFLECT today! You can also visit my website for more information.